Wednesday, March 11, 2009

My boobs are shrinking.

Am I sure? Well, I wore a top today which normally is quite booby, and it wasn't anywhere near as booby. And when questioning Beardie, he performed his Grope Test (the official test of the Boob Shrinkage Committee) and he agreed with me.

You see, I have stopped taking the No Babies Pill. This is because after taking it for about a year and a half, I have finally realised that what it does to my body is not just an adjustment phase I'm going through. What it does to me is what it's going to do to me, forever and ever, if I stay on it. And what it does to me is make me feel like a barren old hag, and give me crappy skin (plus some other things, but this post is a little TMI already), so I quit.

Apparently, what the NBP also did was inflate my boobs.

Who knew! I didn't, and I'm part of the girlfolk. Google knew.

I am just hoping that the bastard pill doesn't wreak its bitter revenge upon me by shrinking them smaller than they ever have been before. Because I would like to keep my boobs, please.

You hear that, hormones? Boobs = yes.

Sigh.

(For the life of me I could not find or draw a picture to attach to this post. Though searching Google for suitable pictures has definitely exceeded my porn quota for the day.)

4 comments:

i.hate.my.name said...

I knew too.

When I first went on the no baby pill, i said to the doctor I want one that will not make my boobs bigger.

It did, so I went back, this time to a different doctor and asked him to change it, because my boobs got bigger and he said he had never heard of that happening.

I need a new doctor.

Lucy said...

God I hate the boob shrinkage, its why I don't exercise. Or diet. :)

Dot said...

I didn't realise everyone calls it the 'no baby pill' too!

RAT said...

i.h.m.n, I wish I'd known about it, then it wouldn't have freaked me out quite so much. I think that maybe I need a new doctor too, since he neglected to mention it completely.

Lucy, I think I have adjusted to it now. I must accept that these are my boobs, and what I had before were my inflated pill boobs, and not really mine. All is well.

Dot, I thought it was just me! I guess "the pill" just sounds so bland. I need specifics, damn it!